There really isn’t much wiggle room when it comes to interpreting the Meat Loaf classic rock opus, “Paradise by the Dashboard Light.” It is a cautionary tale about a seventeen-year-old boy who makes a rueful, life-altering decision in order to satisfy his virginal libido. The song, like many 70?s classic rock songs, is divided into three parts. Part one describes the beginning of the date night, as the singer is all happy-go-lucky. But in part three, the singer is regretful and miserable and prays for the end of time. The transition between these polar opposite emotions occurs in part two, where the girl (sung by Ellen Foley) issues an ultimatum, “Before we going any further… will you love me forever? … Will you make me your wife?” The boy tries to stall and dodge the question, “Let me sleep on it,” but the girl will have none of that and presses for an answer.
The real reason why the song is so beloved is the spoken word bridge at the start of part 2. It is a fictional baseball play-by-play account announced by famed New York Yankees announcer Phil Rizzuto. In the background, we hear the couple engaged in some heavy foreplay. There is no mistaking that Rizzuto’s words are 100% euphemism for sex. The songwriter, Jim Steinman uses the common (in America) baseball euphemism to describe the progression of the couple’s make-out session. For his part, Rizzuto always claimed that he had no idea what his role was really about in this song until he heard the finished product.
As a metaphor, the bridge makes perfect sense. But no one has ever taken this at face value. Let’s do a thought experiment and imagine that Phil was broadcasting a real-life major league baseball game. If we do, we would conclude that the song is even more brilliant that it’s given credit for; since the baseball events are so absurd and full of so many errors by everyone involved – from the players, to the coaches and managers, that the baseball sequence is also a metaphor for the monumental errors in judgement that the boy is going to commit all for the sake of sexual pleasure. Continue reading →
